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Faith Isn’t an Emotion, It’s a Commitment
“I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him for that day” (2 Timothy 1:12).
When C.S. Lewis died on November 22, 1963, most newspapers never mentioned that fact. Some papers carried a brief news note on an inside page, stating that the Cambridge Professor of Medieval Literature had died of heart and kidney failure. On page one of newspapers, on the day Lewis died, was the vivid picture of an American president, John F. Kennedy, who had been cut down by assassin’s bullets. No wonder Lewis’s passing drew only scant mention.
His full name was Clive Staples Lewis, which may account for his using only the initials “C.S.,” or simply “Jack,” to his personal friends. Lewis was a brilliant man, and a keen thinker. He wrote on a vast number of themes including English literature, theology, and children’s stories such as the Narnia Chronicles, filled with mythical beings and fairy tale characters.
Some refer to Lewis as an apologist, or one who defends Christianity, yet Lewis never really intended to defend anything. His book, Mere Christianity, which came from a series of radio lectures during World War 2, was the tool that brought Chuck Colson to an understanding of who Jesus Christ is, and has spoken to the hearts of millions of people. His logical, intuitive mind simply concluded it is more rational to accept the Gospel and its implications than to disbelieve it.
As a youth, Lewis was a believer. Then, partly because of his own struggle with his sexuality, he abandoned his faith and claimed to be an atheist. Eventually, however, the Gospel again became meaningful and he fully embraced Christianity, this time with deep commitment.
Lewis never based his salvation on feelings or emotional experiences. To the contrary, he later wrote that before he was converted there were times when Christianity seemed very logical, and after his conversion there were times when atheism also seemed logical. He believed you have to tell your emotions where to get off, otherwise you dither back and forth, uncertain of who you are or what you believe.
His personal life was complex and his path to faith was marked by intense struggles and personal conflicts. He never learned to drive a car, and he was a failure when it came to practical things like fixing something around the house. Though book royalties eventually amounted to rather large sums, he generously gave most of it away and never could handle money. But he was a master at handling words. When it came to making complex things simple, he was good—very, very good.
Having met an American writer who admired him, Lewis eventually married and became a father to her two children. At first, Lewis admired Joy Gresham, but didn’t really love her. Forced, however, with either the choice of marrying her or losing her because the British government was going to deport her, he married. But eventually he fell in love with Joy, and she became an inseparable part of his life.
When she died of cancer, Lewis was shattered. He felt as though God let him down. “I turn to God now that I really need him,” said Lewis, “and what do I find? A door slammed in my face, the sound of bolting and double-bolting, and after that … silence.”
Yet Lewis held on to his faith, not based on feelings of pain and loss. If there is one very powerful thing about which the life of C.S. Lewis speaks to my heart, it is the fact that your faith must never be based on your emotions or feelings, but the truth of the Gospel. C.S. Lewis, the apostle to the skeptics, a man whose life speaks as loudly as his powerful words.
Resource reading: 2 Corinthians 6.

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